So
and more also do God unto the enemies of David, if I leave of all that
pertain to him by the morning light any that pisseth against the wall.
//What on earth is this all about? David appears to be miffed at people
peeing on the wall, and promises to go after them, leaving none of them
alive by morning. Is it really that serious a crime?
While
this verse may be interpreted in today’s vernacular as a warning about
posting pissy sayings on one’s facebook wall, in Bible days it was a
common euphemism. One who “pisseth against the wall” is merely anyone
who pees standing up. That is, a male. The phrase actually occurs six
times in the King James version, though its bawdiness is covered up in
more delicate translations.
So why resort to graphic language? Why not just say “male”?
It’s
poetry, guys, which would probably be appreciated if we hadn’t become
so Victorian! The Jewish Talmud quotes Rabbi Johanan sharply criticizing
“anyone who reads the scripture without tunefulness.” The Hebrew Bible
is a literary achievement, meant to be read in a rhythmic, melodic
chant. “Wall,” or beqir, sounds very much like “morning,” or boqer. Read the verse aloud in your best Hebrew to hear the alliteration: ad ha-boqer mashtin beqir.
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